Sunday, November 10, 2013

What A Day!

My heart has been very thankful these past fews days. More than usual for some reason that I just can't understand. Maybe the time of year? Maybe the week we have had? Maybe God just changing my heart? For whatever reason, I am grateful for the change. Today, however, all I could do was cry. It's my time of the month and that always makes me relive my miscarriage all over again. As much as I would like to skip this time of the month it continues to appear and I just continue to pray that in God's time we will have another child.

We get to church and the first little clip was for/about Veterans. That tugs at my heart for so many reasons. I'm thankful for their service. I have families in my mind that are single because their loved one is serving. And to think I get aggravated when Mark is working late. Selfish on my part. Knowing my brother in law will be deployed in January brings about more emotion because I know my sister will be left alone for several months. This alone makes me emotional. This is a job that deserves utmost respect whether they chose to be in the service or knew that was the only place for them. Regardless, I respect all military for the job that they do keeping us safe.

Next up, adoption. Our sweet pastor and his wife introduced their new son and daughter from Africa. I mean how awesome to obey God's calling to love a child/children as your own. To make your family look as the nations. No matter the color. These precious children will now know they are loved and will never be left alone again. We have also learned with in the past month that a set of our friends are beginning the adoption process. It brings joy to my heart. Adoption is such a beautiful thing in my eyes.

Imagine if someone came to you and wanted to take care of all of your debt meaning that you are now debt free. Hmm what would that mean/do for you? God did all of that for us by dying and taking care of all of our sins. It's gone and all he asks is that we ask for forgiveness. Man, that hit hard this morning. The message was actually on being strapped...strapped for money that doesn't always allow us to do what we would like because we owe someone. Very true. I wish all the time I had more money so I could give to this or do something nice for someone else. I know that day will come and I hope that we are disciplined enough to meet our needs and share with others.

Then I text my Dad to let him know I have been thinking about him this week and he lets me know he was headed to the cemetery for the first time since Mamaw's passing. This broke my heart all over again. I miss that lady so much and to address thank-you notes this afternoon and not send her one with a picture of the boys killed me. She was just my grandma, so I know how much his heart must hurt losing his mom. I look forward to going in Christmas and being able to go with him to see her and Papaw.

Needless to say, my emotions have been on a roller coaster today. And if I wanted to cry again, I can just think about Mark going to work tomorrow!! Enough, i know, maybe rest is what i need! In the meantime, all three boys are down wresting and for that I am happy! For healthy boys, for laughter, for a mess to clean in the morning, and so on.. "Give thanks to the Lord for he is good and his love endures forever."

Love,
Amber

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